So it's been awile since I posted... So much has happened and I can honestly say I feel like talking about any of it.

6 Things...

This is what ya do:
1. Link to the person or persons who tagged you.
2. Post the rules on your blog.
3. Write six random and/or revealing things about yourself.
4. Tag six people at the end of your post and link to them.
5. Let each person know they’ve been tagged and leave a comment on their blog
6. Let the tagger know when your post entry is up on your site.

So here we go, my 6 things (WARNING! Possible TMI ahead):

1. I have a love/hate relationship with scifi... I love it because its awesome and I hate it because I cannot do the things they do.

2. I have one of the absolute worst tempers and it never makes sense why I lose it.

3.  I have a fascination with scars. Not intentional body mutilation just scars that happen naturally... Like a road map of a persons life.

4. Once I got married I lost the ability to open cans of tomato sauce.

5. I cant seem to grasp the fact that people can get uncomfortable discussing things and would rather someone just say they aren't comfortable about discussing a subject.

6.  A fear of death colors every action and every thought of my day. 

Sex is fun. Sorry if some ppl see it as an itch to be scratched or something dirty but I dont. Its one of the best things we as humans do and i revel in it.

So i worked the air show this weekend. It was busy and tiring but we put on a good show... We had over 70 media representitives there. Given that almost all were air show junkies it was still good to see the attention. Now im going to relax. Ahhh.

Whatever I'm feeling lazy and antisocial.
Why does Erik keep inviting people over my house?

Loss

My Bapa (also known as Grandfather) is 80 years old. He retired Navy and last birthday he cut his cake with his sword. Everyone thought he was wacky when he did but I get it. Not much longer afterword he was in and out of the hospital for over a month.

He didn't think he was going to make it. He wouldn't say that now because its not good to speak about death lest you attract its attention but I am sure thats what it was and he didnt want to risk going quietly into the dark.

I admire my grandfather, hes lived a long and interesting life. He has three children and 6 grandchildren. He fishes in the brook behind his house and builds birdhouses.

I can't say that I really know him though. Just recently sheading the naivety of youth doesnt give me much time to view him through adult eyes and I dont think he will make it much longer.

I have been thinking alot about that. The deeper relationships we can develop with our family as we get older. My aunt died right before I deployed and sometimes I think I see her still. I'm pretty sure that it is my mind unwilling to let someone go but still its unnerving when you are driving down the highway and the lady next to you looks exactly like your dead aunt.

I never got a chance to forge that deeper understanding of her. I remember that she loved hand grated cheese and feather bed toppers but I couldn't tell you much more about her. I cant say I really knew her either.

As I sit here I can't help but wonder who will be the next to leave with out me really knowing them? Who will I eventually leave without them really knowing me?

Erik so has one right now

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rXLHWmjA5IE


Hahaha poor little bunny.

Seriously? Are we fucking 13?

So someone I work with is being reassigned to a lesser position. Same pay just not as much prestige.

Thats not the issue though. The issue is all this person did wrong was not interact with the civilian in my office the way she wanted.

The Civilian then launced a career killing campaign which pretty much succeeded. Okay now.... WHAT THE FUCK ARE THE PEOPLE AT THE TOP THIINKING LETTING THIS FLY???

I know my AG was pretty much kept in the dark but my AAG has some fucking issues if he crushed someone just to keep The Civilian happy. Anyway, they just commited like the absolute perfect IG complaint I have ever seen. If it was me being bent over the barrel I wouldn't even stop on the way from finding out to the IG's door.

Fuck seriously people. You are going to attached the social stigma of being reassigned to a pretty decent Soldier just because she didn't jump when your no rank holding answering machine asked? Are you fucking tapped?

I don't often get disallusioned with the Military, in fact I usually love it, but this just takes the fucking cake.

Im sorry if I'm not being clear on the subject. I really am trying to be obtuse because hey, I don't want to be next on the list.

But its fucked for sure.

Victimology

So im posting this from my phone because i am inatalling updates on my computer. I am taking an online class on victimology and i cannot download my prof's audio lectures for some reason. Great. BTW this is the class thats assigned readings have convinced my boss that i am studying to 'be a crack whore'. That is a direct quote. This class could potentially ruin me. Stupid online courses I knew they were too good to be true.

What is it with people and secrets.

So vacations are on their way. I will be spending Memorial Weekend in Florida with the great in laws whom I have never met. It should be interesting, I hear stories of Tiger skin rugs and such.

The weekend in Newport was pretty good. Although have you ever felt like you should have just stapled your mouth shut? Yeah I had one of those moments. Of course I was drinking at the time but no excuses.

Seriously I wish people would realize I don't want to know their deep dark secrets that way I can't break my strange moral code of confidentiality. But no, we just have to tell Me everything and put your secrets in my hands!

WTF people. I can't keep my own secrets I don't need yours!

PT in the morning is the absolute worst invention it beats out Sham Wow

So I worked out this morning which after almost six years in the National Guard (about three of it active duty) I should know better.

Some people say they feel better after working out in the morning, more focused... They are LYING!!!!

I feel like shit. Tired, distracted and sore.

If I work out in the afternoon/evening I conviently miss the crash were I can't function as a human being any longer.

Tomorrow is an afternoon workout day for sure.

Lying jerks.........

Star Trek and X-Men

Not a Trekkee... but after seeing the new Star Trek it makes me want to be. I dont think I could stand watching William Schatner but if they do more movies with this cast I will pay cash to watch them at the theater.

Also saw the new X-Men and I'll tell you I was a little disappointed. It basically just filled you in on what happened to Wolverine before. (Which was the point but I dont think it deserved to be a whole movie.) Hugh Jackman is smokin' hot though. Definately worth five bucks to see him topless.

Break down: Star Trek, not enough beefcake. X-Men, not enough story. See Star Trek.

PS - I can't wait for Terminator just because of Christian Bale.

MFH and Getting Ready to do Battle

There is a Sgt that i work with who is pretty much forcing me to go shoot video of the funeral honors team so they can enter a contest. Not for nothing but that isnt my job. Not like it matters in the least in PAORI. At least I can take comfort in the fact that Sgt old has to suffer with me. Although he probably loves this shit.

I preparing to do battle with my homework. Only one more day and then I will have a two week break in classes. BTW I confessed to my student advisor that I only wanted the degree and screw the poor children who need professional instruction. They only listen to their XBOX(s) anyway.

I hope that doesn't effect her judgement of me too much. (Did I mention I'm taking one of her classes this fall)

Mobile Blogging

Oh its on now...

All that stuff I think would be great to blog. Well now it can go up as soon as I think of it.

Yay for crazy accessible technology!

This is a test.

Jake and Maggie

Here are some photos of our two Pug/Beagle mixes, Maggie and Jake. Courtesy of the 110th PAD's new gear. First Maggie and the second is Jake doing his best impression of Last of the Mohicans. 

I love them and think they are hilarious. Especially when they are sleeping.

Adoption

I want to adopt. Not some cute cuddly asian baby. I want to adopt a kid, someone who needs me. Some one who wants me. I dont just want to choose my child, I want them to choose me too. It really irrates me that people seem to assume that as soon as I say I want to adopt that they get a mental picture they see me with a baby. What the hell I dont want a baby for? I could just make one if I wanted a baby. I don't have reproductive issues.

Its like when I joined the army. There was no question, no moment of maybe this was the wrong idea. It fit and became a part of me. Just like how I feel when I think about adopting. It just fits.

~Erik just forced me to go on a walk with him. i was happy to ineffectually express myself but he took me out and we had a good talk. Now I feel less hostile to people who dont understand were i am coming from.

Latinos want to be underappreiciated

True story:

A woman in my Foundations in Education Class made the following statement in regards to the high school drop out rate of Latinos in the United States being 20% or so.

"maybe they like the way they are... I mean maybe they like the standard of life they have now."


Erik is watching "Driving Miss Daisy".

DTS sucks

So we are super far behind on our training schedules and I seem to be the only one it matters to. Of course when the mass emails go out listing the shitbags that dont have their training schedules approved its my name on the list.

Ok so it is primarily my fault. I cant honestly find the time when DTS is working and I have enough time to go through all 500 hundred steps to put in a two day training schedule. Any one else have any issues with this?

I think that I am going to cut some corners and go for a History Degree instead of Secondary Education. I mean I make more money doing the job I have now then if I was to become a teacher...

Good plan I think.

Go ahead try that shit again bastard

Maggie and I went for a run today. There is a perfect two mile loop around my house so I wanted to try it out. It went really well until Maggie got attacked by a dog.

She is fine. I scared it off and I think it may have bitten her spiked collar. Fucking dog ran across the busy street to get to her.

If I hadnt of been able to scare it off I would have had to hurt it. If it trys that bullshit again I will.

Now I love dogs. All kinds. This one was a Pit bull (a breed I happen to be pretty fond of and have owned myself). Pit bulls can be great dogs but there are a few things you have to realize about them.

1) They can be dog/animal aggressive.
2) Once the chase is on they can be hard to stop

That being said, WHY THE FUCK WOULDN'T YOU MAKE SURE YOUR DOG CAN'T ESCAPE THE FUCKING YARD?????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

People drive me insane.
I am more angry at the owners than the dog.

The Megington Trust

Someone made a comment last week about me being the brains of my marriage. Its not the first time I've heard it and it wont be the last (sometimes I think it myself) but I really feel as if, if anything, that I am just holding the wheel for a little bit. I have no strong desire to be the Alpha in our little family.

The truth is my relationship frequently baffles me. Do I or do I not want to be in charge? Yes or no? The answer is YES I DO!!!! and also NO I DONT. I like being in control but I dont like all the responsiblities that come along with it. I dont want to play mom or bill collector for my husband.

So Im the Megington Trust Bank for now, just holding the reins until hes ready to share the load and make responsible decisions together.

heavy sigh......

Im watching NCIS right now and the plot line is paranoid schizophrenic who imagines a person who advises him of a plot involving Iraqi war money. The deal is this guy "talks" with an imaginary person for two years before anyone figures out there is something wrong.

It makes you wonder the things we could be subject to from our own brains. The stuff we just dont understand about ourselves. I know it freaks other people out. It freaks me out.

Oh I went running with Erik's dad today. I sucked. I remember when I wouldn't sweat after 3 miles. Well I barely finished out two and I had to walk. How mortifying! I had to walk in front of The Burmeister...

I had avoided that just for that reason. I dont want them to know my weakness. It bothers me, but I'll get over it.

Thoughtful

Let me clarify my last post about decorating my house. I love E and R for giving us all of the help. E especially, cause she single handily decorated my house in two days. Its not finished yet but it looks ten times better than it did.

I was thinking about friendships today and why I have this adverse reaction to developing them. I have a friend who I recently started backing away from. She started telling me more about her life and then like clock work I distance myself.

The weird thing is that she didn't have anything crazy special that was like "whoa". So I started thinking about that and why I did it.

I think it is because I expect people to be perfect. Not messy and confusing like my own life. How weird is that? Erik isn't perfect and I don't expect him to be, so how come my friends have to be?

I dont know why but now that I know I do it hopefully I can work on it.

New Job

So the new year brings new things like a new Job. Its the same job I do now but with more money and more responsiblities. Well bring it! I'm ready.

My step mother in law stopped by to "help" decorate. By help I mean overwhelm me with ideas to the point where I was picking one out of ten. The living room looks nice now though.


PS- Im watching Mark and Olly: Living with the Machigenga and they are hilarious. Mark especially is one snarky jerk.

Foolish

I made an ass of myself today. I backed my car into a fire hydrant in front of several high ranking officers at the homecoming today. No excuse for it, I wasn't paying attention and blam.

Erik's first question? "Did you hurt the car?"

Answer "Nope, I'm okay though."

I'm fine. You know my pride is hurt a little and I have decided to swear off Quonset for a bit but still whole and healthy. Everything embarassing that happens to me in the military happens at Quonset. Vomit and fire hydrant accidents jeez.

Super tired with a headache.

Silent treatment = peace and quiet

So I am exhausted again. M and I did a 3 mile road march with 25lb packs and it wiped me out. I know it doesnt seem like all that much but it puts a hurt on me.

Tomorrow will have to be upper body because I wont be able to move my lower body.

My brain is fuzzy and I have had this incredible fantasy playing in my head all day. We win the lottery using one of the tickets the haji-looking guy gave us at the gas station. Then we go out an by a huge chunk of land where we can have horses and sheep. We can build eco-friendly homes for the whole family.

I would love that!

Busy day

I feel like the energy has been sucked out of me. I got home from work/grocery store at 6:30. Then I took the dogs for a quick run/walk(already ran once today) and came in to start cooking. I finished cooking at 8:00. Now I have been sitting since then trying to relax but between the dogs and the phone I feel not relaxed.

I really wanted to paint the office tonight but I am pretty much done in.

Plus its not really fun.

New Dog

I had a bright idea. So we got an other dog to be Maggie's friend. The only thing is that he needs alot of people attention because he isnt very well socialized and it takes away from the attention I would like to give Maggie.

For instance right now as I type Jake is laying right near me while Maggie is caged in the other room. Why? Because they cant calm down together and Jake howls if hes left alone.

Dont get me wrong I still think getting another dog is a good idea, it's just that I cant wait until hes fully intergrated into the family and I dont have to worry about dividing my time.

It doesnt stop the guilt from surfacing when I can't give Magface the attention she deserves.

P.S. I think Erik hates Jake (which makes me feel bad for Jake).

Domestic Goddess Part II

OK... I am pretty close to fucking losing it on Erik when he gets home. Im on my way home from class and he starts bitching about how the dogs will crap on "his" lawn and make it have dead spots. My arguement is duh of course the dogs will crap on the lawn. If you want a nice lawn then you have to remove the crap. End of story. That doesnt sit well with him. He wants a dog run.

Alrighty then, dog run. Whatever. Thats fine really as long as he realizes that a dog will not always poop where expected and if we let them on the "his" lawn then they will probably poop there to. (I just dont want the dogs to be restricted to the dog run for their entire outside experience- reason for me being against the dog run)

Then he gets all huffy because the house isnt clean yet (previous owners were sloppy and dirty). ~Fine by me. Maybe he'll actually consider cleaning up after himself for once. ~ WRONG, it's my fault the house isnt clean. So the tangled up extension cords in the breeze way? I put them there. The socks on the floor of our bedroom? My fault. The dirty dishes in the sink? Me again!

Now I really do realize that I create just as much mess but come on man! Seriously, you want me to clean the entire house and pick up your leavings while I'm at it?! Who the fuck do you think I am? Martha Stewart or one of those Stepford Wives?

Last time I checked I was neither and its not going to change anytime soon so maybe you should start putting in some time instead of fliting from project to project like some hummingbird with ADHD.

That said I really do love my husband. For all his quirky strange habits and inspite of his "master of the universe" attitude sometimes, he is still my honey bunches. A little understanding can go a long way boy-o!